Sunday, January 01, 2006

New Year's / New Year's Eve

New Year's Eve - well, I thought I was supposed to spend time with my best friend---hang out at her house, etc. Tried calling her, but could never get a hold of her and my phone never rang either. It did NOT start out the day well as I was looking to her for support. For some reason New Year's Eve was not an evening I was looking forward to --- friends are married or coupled up, I didn't have any 'real' plans, etc. It all boils down to I felt downright lonely.

I did get my hair straightened though. So that was the last step in a week long Started out with a cut - cutting off over 5 inches! A color AND highlights. And finally the straightening - japanese thermal straightening. It makes my hair straight as a board. A lot of people think I am crazy to straighten my curly hair - especially considering the time and expense, but I had done it for the first time 10 months ago and figured 'what the hell' I'd do it again.

So, as time ticked away on New Year's Eve, I thought about going out with some other friends. Tried on clothes and everything I tried on I HATED. Either too tent and awning (baggy) or too small. It was not a nice experience and put me in a worse mood than I was already. I felt SOOO fat. And yes, I did try to rationalize it by saying I used to weigh 30 pounds more and that only made me feel worse - go figure.

I honestly think that New Year's Eve was harder for me than Christmas. Oh well, I went to my friend's house for a couple hours and then was home by 10:30. Flipped channels and of course started feeling hungry. Was I hungry? Hell no. It was all in my head. I made myself some sugar-free hot chocolate and had that instead. I think I fell asleep before midnight.

Today - I stepped on the scale. Holding steady. This is OK as I tend to hold steady and then drop. The big thing that would make a difference is exercising. I haven't been doing much of anything. That changes tomorrow...

My goals for 2006:
Exercise a minimum of 3 times per week.
Get fills when/if needed.
Eat bandster meals consistently.
Drink my liquids everyday consistently.
Be at goal on or before my year bandiversary (November 16) -- I thought a lot about this and this is reasonable as I have 55lbs to goal.
Widen my circle of friends

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