Where oh where did that band blogger go?

In reading everyone's BYOC postings, I thought about the question about do you lie on your blog. I don't lie, but I do leave a bunch of personal stuff out. It's the only way I can have my blog and retain my anonymity. At times it can be hard, but my blog is to record my journey with the lap band for myself and as a resource (used loosely) for others.

While I recognize that my posts don't necessarily talk about the band per se as much anymore, it bugged me when bloggers that were banded left...or probably better said as "disappeared". And, there was also a gap back in 2005 of finding blogs that chronicled some longer term success. Some bloggers left prior to hitting goal, some ending on high notes and others not so much, but some bloggers hit goal and then said "adios", they were going off to live - no time to blog. Well honestly, I'm living. I have been living through this entire journey. I just try to take time out (more so this year every week) to stop long enough to put out a post. This journey never ends. I would say my focus is less and different, but it's still there.

For me, I knew I could hit my goal. It's not a cocky statement - it's part of my yo yo history and I'm really not proud of it. Bottom line I wasn't able to ever keep the weight off. I was the statistic of losing the weight, but putting it back on with some bonus pounds. The band was another tool in my arsenal in my personal struggles with weight, emotional issues, and depression. The band has forced me to be "present" when I am eating. There's just no way not to be and in hindsight I am not sure I ever was prior to being banded. There are a whole slew of other changes - I should probably think more on that for a different post as they are hard to put into words on the fly, but I think an important exercise.

Every now and then, I wonder how these people doing are doing. Did they make it? (I hope so.) Have they maintained? (I hope so.) Have they also encountered struggles and challenges whether they hit goal or not? (I'd guess they have.). So I'll keep blogging, checking in, reflecting, and reading...

All weekend I was in a reflective sort of mood, so I was looking at the few "before" pictures I could locate. It's so hard to believe that my life (and hence weight) was that out of control---maybe just sad more than anything else. All I can say is WHOA!

In the coming weeks, I'm going to try and attempt to put together a collage to put out here. While the changes on the outside are significant, I am just as proud of the changes on the inside. The inside changes are likely the ones that have cemented my success this time (man, it's hard to say "I'm successful" - I need to work on that I guess--I get embarrassed more than anything) and resulted in bonus weight loss.

Last Week's Exercise Round Up from Polar:

• 7 hours 2 mins
• 3765 calories